I’ve been in a funk the last 6 months or more. I’ve been cranky, cynical, and generally uninspired for a while. Part of it I think has been the passing of my Dad earlier this summer. That was definitely a contributor, but probably not all of it.
Among lots of other things, the election also kind of dragged me down a bit. It was so negative regardless of what side you were rooting for. And it consumed so much of my reading and thought, which I think wasn’t helpful to my overall mood.
It’s easy to be flip and say that you just need to be thankful and focus on the positives, especially during the Thanksgiving season. That’s certainly kind of true. But lets’ be realistic. Things often don’t work out the way we want – bad things happen, enemies fight, deficits need to be addressed, people get sick and die.
But I think the root of things has been an excessive focus on the stuff that’s been happening TO me or TO the world and people around me. I haven’t thought enough about what I’m doing myself – I’ve been more or less on autopilot, largely because of the frantic pace of our family’s life with two little kids, and two working parents trying to do a great job in our respective roles.
As Thanksgiving rolls around, it’s a reminder for me to be really thankful for the many blessings in my life. But that sense of blessedness should also be a motivator to BE better as a result.
It starts at home. I’m so thankful for my wife who is such an amazing woman and really deserves a husband who makes her feel great about who she is as a mother and partner every day. I need to be better to her as a husband in a lot of ways.
Same goes to my kids. They are the greatest gift. And I really need to be better for them. I need to be more present and enjoy our time together more. And I need to be more intentional about how they are growing up, so they both feel secure and confident and become people of character that have a heart to contribute to this world.
I’m also super grateful for my work. It’s a privilege to do what I do and be a small part (hopefully) of solving meaningful problems through new enterprises applying technology in new ways. And I’m so thankful to be working with really terrific partners who I really admire as people and who drive my own improvement because of our collaboration. I owe it to them and the companies we work with to be better as well. More present, more wise, more hungry.
We’ll see how this all works out. There are a lot of other things that ought to be changed in my life. I should exercise more, I should pray more, I should be more charitable with my resources and my heart. But there is only so much time.
Then again, I don’t think time is really the problem.